Yeah this is the last Friday and it don't hurt that it is a pay day. I am going to see my son Brandon this weekend. I'm closing out the year with nothing but him, I am not hanging out, not going to a club, not getting fucked up. Just going to Chucky Cheese and hanging with the little man. I know this might go without saying to whoever reads this but I love my son. Its important to me to let him know that I love him, so he is stuck with his old man for new years eve. I tell most people that me and his mother have a really good relationship and as far as it goes it is better than most but damn. I wish she didn't fucking hate me (whatever happened to those guys who sung that song, I love them dudes) but that is where we are now. I called to talk to him Wedenday night and he was asleep becasue he was sick, and she and I actually had a civil conversation. I never knew she had alergy problems and now it seems that Brandon has those problems too. Me I'm built like a fucking tank so I dont have shit but tattoos and scars. Any way she only made one shitty comment that I just pretended not to hear. But with that conversation something dawned on me. I know that people respond differently to their parents behavior some people become hardened and some people become soft. CN is a combination of both. She became pregnant with our son her Sr. year in school she took 19 hours had a 3.6 gpa for that semester and she worked a full time job (40 hours) and at night she would go and work at a hospital to get experience for her field. But that being said, I think she is taking out her bad relationship with her father out on me. Yes, I was still going out partying while she was pregnant. (I was in School and I had a 3.6 overall GPA and I was a bartender so I made a living being at the party) And if you ever read the previous post where I wrote a letter to Brandon you understand that I told her when she told me she was having him "We are not going to be together we are just having a child together" Now I know that makes me seem like a shit, but I was doing what nobody else does in that situation I was telling her the turth that's right not selling her a load of crap like "ooohhh baby lets stay together" and while you are not looking I'm gonna go fuck eveything in the state. I loved her as a person and yeah it got physical but there were no dinner dates only a trip to the movies a few times this was just a person I was having sex with. That is not what you build a relationship on trust me one day I will write the MAA Adventures or the Sharika Tales, One bitch took me to court the other wrote my mom telling her that I made her move out of the state and never give her address to me. But Brandon came along and I knew what love is, he helped me grow up. I dont hold a grudge I still got love for you. See you when I get home. Yeah I think I will start to talk more about my personal life and add that with my views I just read this and it is funny as hell to me.
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