Marriage is fucking up my relationship.

You know what, when I wrote the title to this post I misspelled Marriage. That should let you know how much of a fuck dudes care about getting married. Let me explain it is not that we don’t want to marry those women who we truly love and care for but the actual wedding is a bunch of shit to us. We don’t give NO fuck about colors, bridesmaids, and flowers you already know how a man feels about fucking flowers. It is a JOKE, fuck the wedding, Justice of the fucking Peace is the way to go. Why are people spending thousands of dollars for fucking weddings and they go off to live in a one bedroom in the shit part of town. If you love that bitch or that bastard that much WAIT. I can hear you right now “Oh my God Breezy has lost his mind he told me to fucking wait. This piece of shit paper don’t know how I feel I got to marry this bad credit having nicca” That’s right WAIT, if you are one of these dudes that say I have to have this at my wedding or a fucking female who says that I am not going to marry a man unless he gives me this and so and so at my wedding. I hope you rot in the back left corner of where the devil jacks off.
As you can probably tell, I am in the middle of planning a wedding. I am going to be honest; I don’t give a fuck anymore. I went into a fabric store yesterday I am 30 years old and I have not been fabric store since I took home economics in the 9th grade. (That’s where the bitches were so that was my elective on the up side I am a monster at ironing my own slacks and making Mac and Cheese.) Looking at different spools of fabric that were either white or some shade of fucking purple. I hate planning this shit. I love my woman and I am lucky to have her but I promise this wedding shit is going to make me jump on the crack pipe. Let me explain something to women who read this post. The best way to get on a man’s nerves is asking him the same question over and over again. We are not programmed to give a fuck about marriage. We only know about 10-15 colors max unless you talk about car paint. (That would be some hype shit to see a flip-flop paint wedding. That would make dub magazine without question.)
Okay I have some views on marriage that I am going to share. I may be right I may be wrong but this is what I think. You are not married to the wedding; you are married to the person. That was a fucking jewel I just dropped on you bitches read the first line again. I think that allot of people spend so much time obsessing over the wedding they forget what it is really all about. Think about some of the most beautiful weddings in recent History, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Anniston, Million Dollar wedding both of them seeing other people now Prince Charles Lady Diana Million Dollar wedding he had other pussy the wedding night and the list goes on and on. I am trying to say that the ceremony is a beautiful thing I will admit that, but the people getting married is the most important component. That is what women miss it most of the time, you worry about food and where such and such will sit and all this stuff that has nothing to do with anything. If you want a wedding invite only very close family and friends and tell the person you are in love with, that nothing matters more than being sure that we are together in the eyes of GOD. After that go get shit faced with your folks leave there and go somewhere to fuck. I would much rather my future father-in-law tell me Young Breezy (he calls me that, I’m joking he has never called me that not yet at least) I am going to give you a few acres of land in the country since yall didn’t have an expensive wedding. Than him looking at me saying Hey muthafucka you better make it work if not you are paying me the fuck back, or you a shot dead muthafucka.
Next lets me discuss the major problem with weddings, marrying motherfuckers you really don’t like. Here is a simple test if you cannot go three weeks and not fuck your girl but you and her still look forward to spending time with each other then you got something. If you have someone that you love to fuck but right after that you really aint got too much to talk about, you might want to pump your breaks. You see a lot of people get married because of the wrong shit. Money for example only marry for money if you feel you tried marrying for love at least twice and the shit does not treat you like you know you deserve. Marry for money if you are about mid to late forties at that point you need to be taken care of and if you don’t have anything. I don’t advise this but being a realist I know that people have needs and wants and if you cannot manifest these things by the time you are in your forties then you got to do what is best for you. That may not be the popular opinion when spoken out loud but trust me that is really what the deal is 60% of the time. If you don’t believe it ask a woman “If you are in your forties and you have been married twice and neither time worked out would you marry for money?” You get some real ass answers when you ask real ass questions. When you marry for money and your young you get everything you deserve. Don’t say shit when he comes home smelling like pussy, don’t say shit when you start talking too much shit and he puts your ass out. You are a wife true but you are a money hungry hoe you can only hide the person you really are for so long after a person sees what they have they will treat you like what you are.
Sometimes you have bad dudes that are fucked up and have no idea what a treasure they have. There are a lot of dudes out there who have no idea that the woman they have is the best thing in the world. They spend more time fucking low rate hoes than putting work in at home. I am going to tell you dudes something A WOMAN KNOWS WHEN SHE IS BEING CHEATED ON. That is real talk she will turn a blind eye until you do something that gives her HARD evidence but trust me. I have been with a gang of women who tell me the very phrase “I always wanted to fuck you but I was being faithful to my man, but then I found out he was fucking around so fuck it.” That’s right you worried about getting caught, you might be something worst than caught you might be raising somebody else kid. I bet your saying that is some bullshit I would kill that hoe. Wee then you are going to jail, and the kid you have been raising will be fucked out of a mom and a “dad”. You got to do this marriage shit right man. Talk to the muthafucka you are doing this shit with and really plan out what are you working for the next 5 years. It can’t be baby I know we can work it out or I don’t know where we will be living, blah, blah, blah, my ass. Tell me all the good shit and the bad shit. And if you cant get all that then FUCK THEM. That sneaky son of a bitch trying to Georgia you. (If you don’t know what Georgia is ask your cool uncle, never mind the game is losing all of the real players to Georgia someone is to run game on or con them look for Iceberg’s Slim’s book PIMP) You have to be honest and really ask yourself is this the person I want to have my children with. Will they be there for me when everything I have is gone? Or is this person only here because of what I have and who I am. If you go out and spend more on your wedding than you spend on your children, your education, and more than you gave to the church in the last 5 years then what are you really saying. Wake up; my grandfather and grandmother got married in the day when you did it by jumping a broom and the church members made all the food. They were married for over sixty years until my grandmother died. My grandfather never married another woman. No other woman moved into his home. I ask this in closing spend money on your future not the ceremony that most of the people you know are going to forget about if two weeks. Love is awesome and it shouldn’t be forced and it doesn’t need a bunch of fucking multicolored fabric. Take care, I know once this is read I am going to have to fight. But I would rather fight now and have a front yard in a year than vice versa.

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